Uhm, getting my life together (I think)?

To be honest, the last couple months of my life have been hard to keep up with. I don’t know how I’m going to put it into words because honestly, I really don’t fucking know.

If I could sum it all up into one word, I think I’d use interesting.

It’s been interesting because a lot of shit has happened since around my 21st birthday. I guess yeah, now I’m officially a 20-something and currently wearing a bunch of hats, doing a lot of things. I joined a sorority (yeah seriously). I got initiated two days before my birthday and am now officially a Delta Phi Nu sister and Oshawa founder.

I am also now officially back to school full-time getting my Bachelor of Arts degree at Trent University for Communications and Critical Thinking (…that was a mouthful I’m so sorry). I’ve come a long way from that since I started school at the beginning of the year in pursuit of getting a BBA, but one emotional midterms week really changed it all for me. It was a huge pivot and during a time where I really did not know what the fuck I was doing (and I still don’t). But I’m at least holding down the school fort right now (for now).

AND (ya girl ain’t finished lol)

I work at the Toronto International Film Festival as a Junior Social Media Producer, which is still very crazy and surreal to think about and even crazier to say. I started as a Social Media Intern but my contract got extended and from that came a new title. I’ve really loved working here and exploring a different sector of the entertainment industry. It’s probably the most unexpected direction that I ever thought I’d take this year. I’ve wanted to work for TIFF for a while, but never actually imagined working at one of the biggest film festivals in the world. When I posted the photos from my 2020 grad shoot and captioned it with:

I don’t know where I’m going from here, but I promise it won’t be boring.

…I promise you I truly had no idea and honestly didn’t I’d end up exactly where I am now. But I guess I have rejection to thank for that.

The night I sent in my application to TIFF was also the night I received my ninth rejection from the record label of my dreams. And it hurt a bit more because this rejection was from a position in the department I’d done my internship in, so you can imagine what I was going through. I felt like giving up. I felt directionless and I truly didn’t know what was out there for me in the entertainment space, if there was anything out there for me at all. I’ve done a lot to get to where I am (and I’m still working hard to try to get to where I want to), so I was pretty down on myself that day.

My mentor on the social media side had sent me that application but I was waiting to hear back from Universal. After I’d received my rejection email, I gave myself a few hours to cry over it and put together my job application before the deadline closed at midnight. I also sent in an application to the The Recording Academy’s student membership program GRAMMY U and got accepted two days later.

As lost and directionless as I felt, I mustered enough energy to convince myself that there was some other company that wanted me, valued my skill, and wanted to see what I was about. And that ended up being TIFF. It’s funny because I initially applied and interviewed for the role of Junior Social Media Producer, but they ended up offering me an internship through Festival instead.

Safe to say, I’m glad I took it.

I’ve had a remarkable experience and have learned a lot since I started working there (and I am still learning a ton). So in a way, I’m grateful for that rejection and all nine rejections that have come from Universal. They’ve hurt. They’ve been remarkably hard to deal with and have had me questioning my own value at times, but I guess I needed to set my eyes in a different direction and that deadly ninth blow was the one I needed.

I’ve gotten to do a lot of pretty fucking amazing things that I still can’t believe have happened like working the red carpet at the MMVAs, writing for MTV, appearing on an episode of TMZ (and taping for another), interning at the biggest record label in the country, or getting to chill on the set of a music video, but that’s not to say they haven’t come without bumps. Working in the entertainment industry (or even trying to) is not as glamorous as it seems. Or who knows, it might be different if you’re working with talent, but my journey in this competitive industry has been anything but smooth sailing.

Then again, nothing in life really is.

Now before you ask yes, I am still working as a Starbucks barista (and freelance Social Media Coordinator for the store Instagram) and yes, I am still the Social Media Coordinator for WOCDC. This just makes me one busy ass lady. I’m even kind of surprised I had time to sit down and write this (even though this is being written well in advance of its posting). But I’ve found a little bit of time to work on a few things…

If you haven’t noticed, Unfiltered looks a little different. It has a new layout, a new vibe, and more importantly, an official domain. When I started blogging during my freelance stint in high school, I started it on WordPress. I only left because I was 16/17 and didn’t know what to write about. So I shut it down.

But my blog has officially come home to the place it all started.

Not only is it back on WordPress, but the content published on Wix is on here and my creative portfolio lives here as well. Which means everything you could ever want from me is all in one place…

…even my poetry.

I haven’t written a lot since I published When Drifting, She Dreams but since I have no plans on publishing another book any time soon, I figured anything I do come up with could just live on here with everything else.

Now if you’ve seen the old Wix websites, then you’ve seen most of this content before (although there are fewer assets available on the creative projects side). The plus side is: now you get to see all the new content at once.

Easier for me and for you.

But I guess that’s a pretty decent sum up of where I’ve been and what the fuck I’ve been up to. If you’re new here and just discovering Unfiltered for the first time or you’re here from elsewhere, hi it’s nice to meet you. I’m Ellie and welcomed to the NEW El Unfiltered where all of my uncensored and jumbled thoughts lie. This is also now the new home to my photography, my creative projects, and poetry. I’m very happy that you’re here and hope you choose to stay a little while.

Since it’s October, I also wish you a very Happy Spooky szn. And if you haven’t check it out already, join in on the spooky fun with me by taking a look at what I’ll be watching for October Horror Movie Fest this year (aka my favourite time of the year). You can also take a peek at what I listened to in September with my Songs on My Heavy Rotation playlist.

ED out x.

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Listen to: Tia Tamera // Doja Cat ft. Rico Nasty

Listen to The Sound of Unfiltered HERE